Dig through the ditches and burn through the witches and slam in the back of my… Virgin Megastore?

  1. The soundtrack is so cringe. I do not refer to the Powerman/Static-X/Godsmack/etc. music in the club scenes (although that also sux). The film’s score is a jarring mix of post-Matrix techno and conventional string arrangements.
  2. Jennifer Esposito did not have enough scenes before she became a Bride of Drac. She always brings something interesting to the screen.
  3. The guy with the glasses… you know the one. I was happy to see him meet his fate on the airplane.
  4. Christopher Plummer followed up an excellent performance as Mike Wallace in The Insider with his role here as Van Helsing. Truly a baffling career.
  5. Horny Dracula is always better than not-horny Dracula, even though he is pursuing someone who is sort of related to him (I didn’t understand how the leech blood went from Drac to Van Helsing to Mary).


5 Thoughts on… is a quick dispatch on movies that might not otherwise be covered in our normal features.